Alteris

Name: Alteris Heriphem Lonok

Species: Kuijin
Soul Animal: Griffin

Age: nine-teen human years

Gender: Male

Good, Evil, Neutral?: Good

Appearance: His face is kind of a circle slash oval, his green cat eyes are the same shape as his head. He has a very bright orange hair and, on his feet his toenails form out into blunt talons, they come out from the front of his toe to. He is about 5foot 9inches tall and his weight is about 163pounds. His tan/pink skinned body is such a compact build to the point of almost seeing his bones. His hands are semi small for his body and his feet are the same. His arms and legs are about the size they should be to match his body. When in his griffin form he looks different from a griffin he is basically a lion with wings and talons on his feet. He wears a pair of sunglasses, a black suit, over a white button down shirt, nice black pants, and black dress shoes. His casual outfit is a long sleeved t shirt, long pants, and sneakers. In battle he wears to gauntlets, the left, has three blocks in channel like things on it and the right, has two longer channels and blocks in them. The left has three small blades that come out of it, and the the right has two long curved blades flipped on their sides with the bent parts facing each other.

History: In Egypt there were the houses of kuijin like the house of birds, the house of cats, and so on and so forth. Usually kuijin mate bird and bird. If say a bird mated a cat, it was a disgrace to both the houses. That usually ends in banishment of the pair, which is exactly what happened to Alteris’s parents. Alteris was born in Turkey about a year after his parents’ banishment, he is an only child. In Turkey, Alteris’s parents heard about a group of kuijin helping other kuijin blend in with humans. When Alteris was about three, his father was out at a human food store in Romania. He was discovered and killed. When Alteris was eight they settled down with other kuijin in Italy. When Alteris was nine he started going to a school. His mother died from a sickness when he was eleven, and he was taken in by a kuijin mercenary family. By that point his new family still lived in Italy but when he was six-teen they moved to Malta. He
went to a school there while his new dad taut him the trade of mercenary. At the age of eight-teen his dad took him out of school and took him out into the field of mercenary work.

Powers: He has the power to morph into a griffin. He is faster than a human and more agile. The only thing is he is a very slow morpher.

Personality: He’s kind and cheerful and has no dislike towards practically anyone. He even doesn’t really mind a human which is odd seeing that he is kuijin. He likes to learn and do active things. He only has two dislikes one is if he feels useless, like if he can’t help out in a game or something. The other is that he hates it when he sees someone in pain and or being annoyed and can’t do anything about it. That kind of falls under the first though.

Sample RP post: Alteris swung up at his foe knocking the blade from his hand. The man he was fighting started running towards his sword, Alteris shoved the three blocks on his left gauntlet up, and three dagger like blades slid out. Alteris charged at his foe but his enemy had picked up his sword. Alteris stabbed at the swordsman but this time the blow was blocked. The opponent sliced at Alteris, who jumped back and slashed with his right gauntlet, hitting this foe on the arm. The man then swiped at Alteris, knocking his right gauntlet down. In seconds the man had his sword to Alteris's throat. His father, the man currently holding a sword to Alteris's throat, said, " that's enough training for the day," and started walking away, Alteris followed.

'Tis great, yes (another kuijin, =w=), but, a few errors still.
Such as the RP post example. You can't begin RPing if this is your first character, without an RP sample. Then, you can begin. So you shall need to post an RP sample.
Needs more elaboration on the powers. He can't morph into anything, can he? Heh.

But overall, good.

I enhanced the appearance and added the sample RP post.

...It is good, except it need a tad more elaboration and in the sample RP, post I counted the phrase "the man" 10 times.

I kinda ish fixed it...... I said he after I mentioned one of them. And I'll probably add other words

AAAAEEEEGGGHHHHH, now it is confusing.

Erm, SRPP (Sample Rp Post) needs to be fixed. You use commas when you don't need to, and you don't use ponctuation when you need to. =_=
Take a thesaurus.

Better?!!??

Yes. Yes, indeed. Small errors, and mistakes, but better nonetheless.

I stink at fight scenes by myself.... I stink at RPing in general......

Don't say that. Anyways, it's accepted.

ACCEPTED.

This is a site open to beginners as well as advanced RPers. The phrase 'I stink at RP' should only be applied when RPing with Whilaroo and/or CopynPaste once they 'get into the stride'. Don't worry about being bad at RP, you gotta start somewhere!

RothMercian wrote:

This is a site open to beginners as well as advanced RPers. The phrase 'I stink at RP' should only be applied when RPing with Whilaroo and/or CopynPaste once they 'get into the stride'. Don't worry about being bad at RP, you gotta start somewhere!

Actually, it shouldn't be used whatsoever, in my opinion =w=
But I guess epic proportional stuff might happen if ever Whil and I RP together alone.
Right, Whil? =w=

I agree that the term should not be used, and if you should ever believe in its import, stop saying how bad you are and use the time spent saying 'I stink' to improve yourself to a point where you can at least enjoy your own work. You are good Naveion with only some refining necessary to make you what I believe could be and will be a great rper...

Epic and proportional... yes, I suppose that something phenomenal would happen if the two of us were stuck in a topic together. Although, I get the feeling that the meeting of two such forces as ourselves might be somewhat violent. I see immense blocks of text filled with incomprehensible words in the strangest syntax. Just the thought of it makes start to drool. Okay, starting to sound a little psycho.

Strangely I feel a bit giddy, like I need to blow something up...

Like the revisions you made to the rp post, Naveion...

I think I'm gonna' make a new Role Playing Event...

Hmmm... might I comment? I think I shall.

Gotta quickly say it cuz I need to go: ARGH. NOOOOOO. KUIJIN=NOTRANSFORMINTOANIMAL. DDDDDD:< They are animals which transform into some other form, usually human cuz it helps blend into one of the most common species on the planet.

Sorry......

Seems that Exalok is back just to criticise your BIO. Poor you, Nave. I can't stop her, after all, she is the most experienced RPer on the forums, even though she won't RP anymore, and that she will add stuff to the Kuijin Breed Description.

xDD Sorry. It's just I'm obsessive over my species, so I get really finicky when I see mistakes. Don't take it personal <33